Saturday, November 22, 2008

給老大的一封信

老大....

媽媽很累了....一路陪你走来..媽媽真的累了...累得好想放棄.
你總是那么的任性,霸道,佔有...總是想媽媽注意你....
但你卻同了不對的方式....總是要惹媽媽生气...到最后落到媽媽動手打你...你才罷休.
你知道吗? 当媽媽動手打你时....媽媽心里也在哭
媽媽常问自己: 難道媽媽的教育方式错了吗? 我以前在怀里抱的cute cute 老大去了那里?

你是我们家里迎接的第一個小生命...媽媽把所有的时間都给你..
在弟弟還没有来之前....媽媽從不曾离開過你身邊超過4個小时...
為了让你知道弟弟的到来並没有奪走媽媽對你的愛...
原本想送你去幼兒園的計劃...一直拖到弟弟6個月大才实行.
媽媽知道第一天去幼兒園...媽媽就這样把你丟下就走了....是媽媽不對
你生气了對吗? 雖然事隔2年....但你卻永运无法忘記
媽媽向你说声對不起.....可以原諒媽媽吗?


之后媽媽一直對你做了很多事...好让你了解媽媽對你愛依然如往昔
但你卻不頒情.....常常對媽媽说 : I love daddy big big... i love mummy small small and i love di di medium
媽媽听了心好痛....媽媽也知道是媽媽做的不夠多
答案告诉媽媽;;; still need to work more harded


這几年, 媽媽好努力的去拉好和你的關保
但卻不如我所愿.....你變得越来越固執...越来越情諸化....動不動就發脾气的...
連report card 上....的comment.. 都寫著
he will be good if he can correct his sturboin attitude.
你竟然把情諸带進了學校....還老師也拿你没法子


看来.....也許是媽媽把情諸化的性格給了你....
那天....一位學者说: 世上没有教不好旳孩子....祗有不会教的父母
那句话把媽媽叫醒了.....
是媽媽把你拉得太緊了吗? 還是媽媽一直守著自己的原則...弄到媽媽失去了自我...不開心
媽媽一不開心...你也不開心...到最后全家人都不開心
so 老大...給媽媽一點时間...现在媽媽在找一條路...一條媽媽走得開心的路
擁有自我肯定....又開心的路
你可以幫媽媽找回媽媽失去的自信吗?


明年的你...5 years old 了....长大了...懂事了...
你會明白媽媽的心....對吗?
無论媽媽做了什么決定...你都會support mummy right?
在這里.....媽媽想對你说 :
無論媽媽做了什么決定.......你永远都是媽媽最愛

6 comments:

Jesslyn said...

boys a bit stubborn lar, just give him more time now! after all he is only 5yo....

lil' bulb said...

Audrey, try to have 1 day outing with Jia Jun only, don't bring di di and you will find something different after that.

Karen said...

dear mummy, pls don't give up,"gambate". fr yr post, i know u love him much...but pls believe me, yr elder son loves u very much till he want yr full attention so much. mummy, do more private conversation with him, sleeping talk is great, lil'bulb gave a vy gd suggestion too. daddy may play important role to tell him how mummy loves him. don't worry, he loves u just shown in "special" way..

feiyifan said...

真的很奇怪,我儿子14岁了,5岁的幼稚园事情台海记得很清楚。
他说,开学第一天被司机认错了上错巴士,被送回学校时竟然看到我在吃雪糕,他觉得我不把他失踪当一回事,他很不开心。
我解释,当时我也很怕,可是老师请我吃雪糕,他下车时老师因为没看好学生有点内疚所以第一时间抱着他,我才没有第一时间抱他。况且我雪糕还没吃完没理由丢掉那么没礼貌。
他听了之后才释怀,憋在心内的气也没了。
你可以找个你孩子心情好的时刻跟他从头解释,他会明白的。也让他知道你的心情!
为了让他学校更多才不得不放下他。

Kuen Hoong said...

Very much sounds like my brother's eldest son. Both Sock Peng and myself also try to guide him but somehow, he just try to go the opposite way.. to make everyone angry of him. I like to treats him as adult and talk to him with reasons and he seems understand all of it but then the next minutes.. he will do all sort of things that make you angry again.

天秤座妈妈 said...

Tq for all the blogger who give me the comment.. i really appreciate

Jesslyn
Yaloh, maybe i should give him some time.. anyway thanks a lot of u comment

lilbulb
i will try u way and let u know the result

Karen
I do private convercation and night talk as well... but sometime i really cannot contro my self

Feiyifan
會找個机會和他谈...now.. i still try to recall his bad memory ..tq

Kuan hoong
Yaloh.. my son also like this, always make u angry